Understanding Genuine Happiness

Create genuine happiness, and be grateful when you find it.


The Sophisticats

10/18/2021 5 min read

What is true happiness? Is it something we find or create? Is it both?


Know that Happiness is Relative

Every person defines happiness differently. What makes you happy may not make me feel ecstatic. Happiness is unique for every person. That is because we have different experiences in life. Someone who has been poor all his life may find happiness is acquiring a high-paying job. Someone who has been alone may find happiness from a partner. A kid finds joy in toys and play. Some people may feel happy helping others. There’s are endless reasons why a person is happy. What’s important is to KNOW WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY. If you do not recognize what can truly make you happy, then you won’t be able to find a way to achieve it or find it.


Understand that Happiness is Temporary

Happiness does not last forever. There are things and people that provide us fleeting happiness. They’re gone after months or even after just a day. Others may last longer. But soon, the happiness they give us either fades or goes away.

I'm a single mom who is extremely happy spending time with my son and taking care of him. We constantly make wonderful moments together, and that makes me so fulfilled. Nothing makes a mother happier than her children, in my opinion. But it isn’t always going to be this way. In the future, he will grow. He may grow farther and farther away from me. I know that he will always love me as his mom, but he will have his own life journey. And, I can’t stop him from that. He has to create his own happiness with or without me. My happiness will be on a different path, and that is okay. The happiness he provides me will always be there, but I know that it will never be exactly the same. I will have to meet other people, do other things, and experience new kinds of happiness.

This leads us to the question, “Do we create happiness, or do we find it.”

I think, it’s both.


Creating Happiness

Creating happiness means making the right choices. It’s about selecting the things that make us happy and saying NO to those that may ruin our lives. These choices include the people we will consider friends, the job that we will do, the company we will work for, or the person we are going to marry. Creating happiness is also something we do every single day. It’s my choice to grab a cup of coffee in the morning or while working. This makes me feel relaxed and happy. Watching my favorite movies and series also cheers me up when I feel down. Reading gives me pleasure, and writing just makes me feel ecstatic. These are things and activities we choose to do every day. They are little things, but they can make me happy. So whenever we can, we should choose happiness.


Finding Happiness

Happiness can also be found. It often waits in situations we call “chances.”

Let me give you a very simple example. There was a particular day when I was so exhausted from work, and I decided not to go home yet. Instead, I wanted to just keep walking and take my mind off stress. I was just strolling, listening to music, and letting my feet take me anywhere. Then, I arrived at an obscure place and was unknown to the public. There, I spotted a humble cafe that was quiet and cozy. Since then, I’ve been going there to spend some time alone. It was a simple kind of joy.


Finding happiness by chance can also lead us to something greater. Some people met their spouse in an unexpected time and place. Other people met wonderful friends from a party by chance. And there are many other ways that we find happiness however small or great that is.


Now that we are aware of the important concepts of happiness, let’s take a look at what things can usually make people happy.


1. A Supportive Family

Our existence has more meaning and happiness when we live with a family that is supportive, fun, and genuine. When things go wrong, our family will be (and should be) the ones that help us get back on our feet.

2. Money

Who says money can't buy happiness? Let’s admit it. Money does buy happiness. Money provides us with our needs and wants. This is not to say that money is the most important thing in the world. It’s not, but it is very essential. Money allows us to pay for food, shelter, clothes, school, and other necessities we need to survive. Some people might say, in the past, people could survive by planting their own crops. Well, I am sorry to say that not all people are lucky enough to own a land fit for farming or growing crops. The point is, we really need money to live. However, if we use it in the wrong way, it can lead to bigger problems. We must not be slaves of money. Instead, we must be smart about spending it. That is the only way that we can find happiness with money.


3. Happy Romantic Relationship

If there is something that makes a person incredibly happy, that is a happy and genuine romantic relationship with another great person. Being in a healthy romantic relationship with someone makes us comfortable, safe, and satisfied. Having someone who supports you and knows every little thing about you is truly a reason to smile. Cuddling in the afternoon, having a simple conversation with each other, doing fun activities together, holding hands, kissing, hugging, and many other activities as a couple can make a person in a relationship in cloud nine. Love does make us very happy. The right love, that is.


4. Genuine Friendship

Finding genuine friends is rare nowadays. So, if you have found one, be grateful for it. Real friends can make us happy. Imagine surrounding yourself with people who are interesting, weird, and loyal at the same time. The ones that do crazy and fun stuff with you. Spending time with friends can really cheer you up. Genuine friends are those who do not only celebrate with you in times of happiness but also support you in hard times. They are also the ones who will criticize you to help you improve. Having real people like these can make your life extra fun and meaningful.


5. Special Celebrations

Special occasions can definitely put people in a great mood. That may be a birthday party, Thanksgiving, or Christmas. But what really makes people happy isn't the celebration itself, but how you celebrate it and whom you celebrate them with. A wonderful conversation over dinner or a nice family camping on your lawn is just some simple ways to make any occasion extra special.

6. Simple and Free Things

There are free little things that can also put us in a happy mood. It may be a cup of hot coffee in the morning, a nice quiet stroll in the woods, a simple music jam with your friends, writing a journal, reading a book, sleeping and relaxing, and many more. They are simple happiness that can affect us greatly in life. It is helpful to appreciate these little things. Many old people claim that when we are wrinkly and grey these little moments are actually the ones that will truly matter. Those wonderful nameless days will be the ones that would be remembered well.


Have you figured out what makes you happy? If not, it is time to create or find it.

Get in touch


Baguio City, Philippines