Amazing Lessons We Learn From Self-Growth

Self-growth makes us smarter, stronger, kinder, and much happier.

THAT'S LIFE

The Sophisticats

12/8/2021 4 min read

Embracing maturity and upgrading myself have taught me so many things in just a few years. My views have totally changed making me unable to recognize myself sometimes in a positive way. Here are some of the greatest things I’ve learned on the road to self-love and mental growth. 

1. Privacy is a privilege. 

Working on yourself and living in privacy is beautiful. It’s a privilege. You fail in silence, you succeed in peace. If other people do notice you rising and winning, acknowledge it. Inspire them, if given a chance. If they don’t recognize your success, remember that your victory is for yourself and the people that you love. There is no need to prove yourself to anyone. 

Another satisfying thing about privacy is that you really get to communicate to yourself. Having a private life means doing the activities and having personal thoughts close to your heart. My private time for myself has allowed me to know myself better, and understand my deepest desires as well as weaknesses. 

Finally, my love for privacy has let me sort out people in my life. Sure, I may post some photos and videos in public for aesthetic purposes, but the people who know my private life now are well-filtered. Only the ones really close to me have enough information about me. I realized that I don’t have to let everyone know about my struggles, success, plans, happiness, and love life! Honestly, since I became more private in life, I felt happier… genuinely happier. Privacy is peace, power, and a privilege. Protect it. 

2. Speak less. Listen more. 

A Greek saying goes, “We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.” And I couldn’t agree more. I used to be very impulsive about the things I did and spoke about. But once life hits you hard, it will tell you very clearly that listening is power. In an argument or conversation, most of us speak to respond. I was this kind of person. I had to “hear” what the other person had to say, so I could give a response or an answer which was based on my point of view. But if we listen, we may understand better where the other person’s idea is coming from. We become more empathic. And if we listen more, we will speak to empathize and help. And if we listen more, the content of our words is wiser and more meaningful. I was surprised about how much I could say less but mean more now. Additionally, I don’t have to prove a point which saves so much time and energy. In the end, listening more and speaking less will mostly (not all the time) gives you a wonderful conversation. 

3. Use your “life resources” wisely.

In life, we must take care, conserve, and consume our resources wisely. Resources do not only mean the materials we use. This also means money, time, physical energy, mental energy, and even words. So, when we realize how important our resources are, we save them and use them wisely. Here are some insights.

a. Recharge yourself by doing the things that make you happy. 

b. When giving advice, listen intently. Then speak simply, and meaningfully. 

c. Choose the people you let in your life very well. Don’t let toxic people take your energy.

d. You can say No without having to explain yourself, but be polite. 

e. When having doubts about your career, ask yourself, “Will I be happy to still do this in the next 2years?” 

f. You can’t remove doubts instantly, but let them go a little more every day. 

g. Don’t mind other people’s business, especially people who think you are their competitor. It’s a waste of your precious five minutes.

h. Say things clearly the first time. Repeat the same thing slower the second time. And say no more.

4. Money is important, but it is not everything.

Whether we admit it or not, money is important. What we really have to realize is, it is not everything. Money allows us to buy our needs and wants. It makes life more comfortable, much easier, and much happier. But again, it is not everything. It is not supposed to control your life. It is not supposed to make you kill yourself by working endlessly and neglecting your health. Remember that we can earn money. We can reproduce it. But our lives? Each of us only has one. It’s about time that we make ourselves better, and make money work for us instead.

5. Enjoy the Now.

As we grow older and more mature, we will realize that NOW matters a lot. Let us not be too preoccupied by the future. Sure, it is necessary to be prepared and to think about our next moves, but not to the point that we already fail to enjoy what we have right now. We cannot always plan for the future, anyway. Many things could happen. Many things could change, and sometimes, the changes throw out all the plans and preparations you have made. These are some of the ways you can enjoy the present:

a. Appreciate the things and people you have right now.

b. Cherish happy moments with friends, family, and yourself.

c. Dream about the future but do your best work today.

d. Forgive past hurts.

e. Forgive yourself.

f. Take a break and smile.

g. Stop worrying so much.

h. Appreciate yourself more.

As we grow, we learn, unlearn, experience, love, and live. Make sure you take the lessons, deal with the pain, and come back smarter, stronger, and happier every time.

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