Take Slow Graceful Steps to Move On

Moving on from pain, grief, or misery is something that takes a lot of time and bravery. But there are ways for us to get there one step at a time.

SELF-LOVE

The Sophisticats

2021-09-18 3 min read

People try to move on from different unpleasant things and pains in life. It might be a breakup, the loss of a loved one, or even criticisms from other people. But, whatever it is that you are trying to move on from, it is very important to take it slow and give it time. 

I am not saying that you need a very long time to heal or move forward. I mean, give yourself enough time to accept things, pick up your pieces, and make yourself whole again. Pain and grief do not have schedules. But there are ways to help you become stronger and recover better. 

The things that I am going to share with you may not totally work for everyone, but I hope that you get some realizations in them. After all, every individual deals with things differently. 

Go Out in Nature

Nature has a magical effect on people. Being in nature somehow relieves pressure and negative feelings. In my experience, walking outside on a pleasant day really helped me to get by. I felt instantly fine with the cool breeze and sunshine on my face. I also enjoyed sitting on the grass for some quiet time, and looking at green fields or the trees. Swimming in the sea is very helpful too. Water seems to wash away negativities. I don’t know for others, but nature always gives me a piece of hope and positivity. Of course, this will not totally heal and fix you. However, getting in touch with nature can be helpful in keeping a positive perspective about your day or your life. In the long run, you can even develop this activity into a great habit. 

Be Away

Many people claim that traveling helps them heal. Seeing new places, meeting new people, and experiencing new adventures will allow you to think and feel new. It would be a good idea to do it alone first. But if you prefer to be with your family or friends, that will work too. 

When I was on a trip trying to heal, I explored new places. I love discovering new coffee shops. I remember staying in a new cafe and imagining my life in the future. Somehow, this new cafe away from my city gave me different ideas about my life ahead. I told myself, “I want to stay in this coffee bar, writing for my blog in the future.” Guess what, I’ve done it!  

Spend Some “Me Time.” 

If you truly want to heal, you have to accept how you are feeling at the moment, no matter how terrible it is. Spending some time with yourself will help you confront your negative or sad thoughts and emotions. You may spend this time with yourself by crying, reading a book, writing, or even just laying down on the couch and doing nothing. The purpose of this “me time” is for you to be there for yourself and understand yourself even more. When no one is around, you understand your genuine emotions. And it is very important to know what you are really feeling! This way, you can deal with your pain even smarter. However, remember that you do not do this to push yourself further down or drown in self-pity. This is a way to “talk” to yourself better and get to know how you can deal with these negative feelings along the way. 

Spend Some Time with Genuine People

In my experience, those people who were really helpful were not the ones who said “That’s okay. I’m sure it will get better.” I found that those people who were genuine with their words (maybe a bit harsh sometimes) and actions were the most helpful ones. They are those people who had seen and experienced worse. They really have wise words about life. Here were some of the ideas those people shared with me:

“You can’t change the past, but you can decide for your future. So, move on.”

“No, you are not going to be better soon. It may take years. But you have to face that head-on.”

“Don’t give up on the many beautiful things that could happen in the future, just because of that one miserable thing in the past.” 

“You want to be happy? You have to choose it.”

“I know it sucks. It’s hard. It’s ugly. But you have to keep going anyway.” 

“That’s not your limit.” 

If I am to be honest, your pain may linger longer than you think. But, once you do, the new you will be way more beautiful than what you have expected.

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